This morning as I was getting dressed for the day, Miriam went to my jewelry box and pulled out a little gold cross I've had for 13 or so years. She wanted me to wear it. She doesn't remember, but she cut her teeth on it. Jasmine, who was three at the time, picked it out for me for Mother's Day that year and as Miriam was cutting her teeth (and was a year old) she would just put it in her mouth while I was holding her. For many years the cross was fixed to the chain- welded by the heat from her mouth and the force of her teeth. The little star/ sparkles cut into the soft metal have almost disappeared. Eventually I got it to where it would move again but it can now never come off this chain. She must associate it with me since there's never been a time she can remember when I did not have it. I haven't worn it much in recent years, but as with anything worth having, it has to be worth using.
I wonder if I have been this way with the Cross. Have I been this rigid? Have I tried to fix the Work of Christ on the Cross to a certain thing? It's funny how a small thing like this can make me look at things differently. Last night as I was drifting off to sleep, I remembered a part of a conversation I had with Scott earlier. I had something terrible that stuck in my mind that was associated with a certain song. Every time I have heard that song, the image of that thing would flash before my mind's eye and it was new all over again. It's only a few seconds of the chorus line of this song, but it's used often in commercials. Sometimes he sings it, not knowing the effect it has had on me for years. As I was telling him all this yesterday, without mentioning the song, I told him that I was trying to associate the song with something else- him singing it rather than what my mind had latched onto. So as I drifted off the sleep, it occurred to me that I can give my memory to the Lord to take care of. I realize that is such a simple though really, but I really never had that thought about it before. I had thought of Christ's work on the Cross as not for that sort of thing. I am a very music oriented person- it just stays with me. I am just so glad that the Lord puts a song in my heart all the time AND that music that should not be there, or things that bring destructive sinful thoughts also He can take away.
Now, whenever I think of that little cross, and how it's no longer stuck in place on the chain, I can remember that Yeshua is not limited to saving me for the day of His coming, nor just for directing my path from day to day, but also He can free me from things that have had me bound. I can't believe I have forgotten that- or rather not realized it applies to this too! I hope you are blessed by this and realize that you can be free from the very thing that has enthralled you so long too.