Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Courting


It's been a while since my last post. I have been very busy with some very important people. My dear seventeen year old daughter, the one who was sure this past summer that she would never marry,  has evoked the attention of a young man who has seemed to change his plans for his future to become their future. Right now, they are "Courting." Let me be specific in my definition:

"Courtship is the period in a couple's relationship which precedes their engagement and marriage, or establishment of an agreed relationship of a more enduring kind. During courtship, a couple get to know each other and decide if there will be an engagement or other such agreement." (from Wikipedia)

To state this more within our definition: chaperoned dating with the purpose of getting to know one another in a controlled environment. Today, it's not a popular idea that a young couple be supervised. In fact, it's considered archaic and borders on arranged marriages to some folks. It's none of that actually. It's a protection for the young couple. It helps protect purity, especially in the case that things don't go towards engagement and later marriage. Why in the world would anyone expect young folks to keep themselves from sexual immorality (which incidentally, doesn't start with the body at all but in the heart and mind) by leaving them alone with one another? Voddie Bauchum sums it up here:




We love our girls, and honestly we love the young man who has come to ask permission to get to know her better. We love them enough to help them get to know one another while guarding their hearts from folly.

Life has become very different for us in practice. These are the things we have taught our girls, and now, this is where the rubber meets the road. This is where we have to believe what we've taught about relationships and God's best rather than just giving these young folks over to hormones, emotions, and worldly expectations. We absolutely believe that this is the kind of protection God intends for unmarried people... the protection of their fathers and mothers to navigate correctly while  getting to know someone of the opposite sex. Yeshua said it best in Matthew 5: 27-28: Adultery begins in the heart and that God considers it so even if it's in the mind only!

So, if you have a concern about us....have read on Facebook that Jasmine and Nathaniel are dating and worry that it is unknown to us, or that somehow we've just suddenly taken away our parental protection, just know we haven't. If you see them out in town somewhere, just look for Scott or me, because we're not very far away. Thank you friends for loving us enough to be concerned. :)

Blessings!


3 comments:

  1. I don't have any kids yet, but my husband and I have discussed that in the future any children we have will be completely supervised by us in a dating situation. Its nice to know we are not the only old fashioned people out there :)

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    1. I think it's never too early to think of these things. The earlier you prepare your children, the less likely you are to make a rash decision and the less likely your children will be to think anything otherwise is acceptable.

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  2. Hello, Angela!
    We, too, are on the courtship path...very exciting and also difficult time.

    I saw you linked up your site on the Deep Roots at Home fb page, and I was glad to ‘see’ you there. I love what you are doing here on your blog ~ It is always so much fun and encouraging to get to ‘know’ like-minded gals!

    BTW, I would like to invite you to consider linking-up on the Deep Roots at Home ‘EOA’ Wednesday Link-Up if there is a fit. You can gain more exposure and it would be neat to see you as a regular each week.

    Grace and peace to you in 2013~

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